Caritas News and Happenings

I recently came across a speech written by Theodore Roosevelt entitled, “Citizenship in a Republic, The Man in the Arena”.  The speech was given at the Sorbonne, Paris, April 23, 1910.  It sought to speak of the importance of leadership and the quality and the importance of good citizenship.  Citizenship requires action to bring about improvement for our fellow man.  If one chooses not to act but rather only to criticize, nothing is gained by society and accordingly, there is no improvement.

“Let the men of learning, the man of lettered leisure, beware of that queer and cheap temptation to pose to himself and others as the cynic, as the man who has outgrown emotions and beliefs, the man to whom good and evil are as one.  The poorest way to face life is to face it with a sneer.  There are many men who feel a kind of twisted pride in cynicism; there are many who confine themselves to criticism of the way others do what they themselves dare not even attempt.  There is no more unhealthy being, no man less worthy of respect, than he who either really holds, or feigns to hold, an attitude of sneering disbelief toward all that is great and lofty, whether in achievement or in that noble effort which, even if it fails, comes second to achievement.  A cynical habit of thought and speech, a readiness to criticize work which the critic himself never tries to perform, an intellectual aloofness which will not accept contact with life’s realities—all these are marks, not, as the possessor would fain think, of superiority, but of weakness.  They mark the men unfit to bear their part manfully in the stern strife of living, who seek, in the affectation of contempt for the achievements of others, to hide from others and from themselves their own weaknesses.  The role is easy; there is none easier, save only the role of the man who sneers alike at both criticism and performance.

It is not the critic who counts; not the man who points out how the strong man stumbles, or where the doer of deeds could have done them better.  The credit belongs to the man who is actually in the arena, whose face is marred by dust and sweat and blood; who strives valiantly; who errs, and comes short again and again, because there is no effort without error and shortcoming; but who does actually strive to do deeds; who knows with great enthusiasms, the great devotions; who spends himself in a worthy cause; who at the best knows in the end the triumph of high achievement, and who at the worst, if he fails, at least fails while daring greatly, so that his place shall never be with those cold and timid souls who know neither victory nor defeat.”

I am moved by these statements in many ways.  At Caritas, staff and volunteers work tirelessly to help those that are in need.  They are the ones in the arena providing a refuge to assist the residents with the time they need to learn where their weaknesses stem from and then, provide a nurturing environment to help them gain the necessary strength to rebuild their lives.  Critics quickly point out what is wrong with these individuals, the “system” and society and yet do nothing to bring about change. Change can and does come through action.
If our society is to grow and evolve, we must learn to get involved.  Change comes from the efforts of those that believe in a cause and follow through with their actions.  Caritas has and will continue to work in the community to bring about change but it needs help from people that believe in the program and the change that can be brought through it.

I invite everyone reading this to think about where they fit in.  Are you a doer or a critic?  Are you prepared to get into the arena or do you sit on the side lines and criticize?  Stop and think what you accomplish sitting by the sidelines. As a single individual it is difficult to bring about change.  In numbers, we are able to accomplish a great deal.  In addition, we send a strong message when we unite.  The message is to the residents, their families, society and government.  It is a simple message of mutual respect and love that places the interests of the weaker members of society ahead of our own.  By working together, we lose very little if anything but we all gain a stronger, more wholesome and functional society.

He had a dream, a dream to help a mother who had a son lost to drugs.

He shared that dream with some friends and a little grass roots organization came into existence.  It started by working quietly with little money but with a bigger dream, a dream to save lives.

The organization started to help those that were broken for many reasons. Many refused to believe change could be made to their lives or the lives of loved ones but they refused to give up on his dream.  There was never a purpose served by blaming anyone for the problem but by sharing his dream and others believing that they could  make a difference, lives were saved.

The dream spread and there were many more that came to believe that a dream could come true if you believe. Some donated time, others money. The lives that were saved came back and shared their praise for a program that saved them. They gave of their time and energy. The message spread and more lives were saved not only through the therapeutic community but also through public education and awareness.

Parents started to dream that things could change for their sons, daughters and families. They now had hope. The community realized that monies were better spent promoting this program and helping people than pushing the problem away and out of sight pretending it didn’t exist. The parents started to share their experiences and the family association began. Their support of each other fostered relationships between them and their children. They started to believe and tell their friends that there is no shame in having a problem, only in not believing in the dream and looking for a solution.

The dream kept growing and funding was required. Dinners, donations, a telethon. Word of the dream went out into the community and people started to believe that they could help make a difference. As more and more started to believe, something happened to that dream.  It became a reality.  To all those that have dared to dream with us, thank you.  Caritas is living proof that through the generosity of our community a dream can become a reality that will change the world one person at a time. 

The generosity of the community during this telethon month is testimony to our work. It gives our staff a sense of accomplishment and our residents a sense of self respect and confidence that there are people out there that do care. On behalf of the Boards of Caritas thank you in sharing our dream, believing in it and making it a reality for all those in need.

I had the pleasure last night of attending the Celebration Dinner and Inauguration of the John Paul the Great Family Centre with Fr. Gianni Carparelli. It is a new Centre built by the community for the community with the help of the Arch-Dioscese of Toronto. It is located at 80 Shoreham Drive.

There were over 400 people in attendance including Arch-Bishop Thomas Collins, Judy Sgro, MP and Mario Sergio, MPP. Also in attendance were numerous priests and nuns as well the community at large. What was noticeably missing was the media. I don’t understand why they are quick to report another killing or drug deal in the Jane Finch corridor and give no coverage to the positive actions of a community wanting to take their streets back by providing a refuge for families and youth.

I was impressed with the spirit of community last night, the coming together of numerous cultures celebrating a landmark achievement. I know that through their hard work and continued diligence, they will make a huge difference in the lives of many.

Why did the media not showcase this community for their achievement as a model for other communities?  I guess good news doesn’t sell newspapers!

Its time media starts taking more responsibility in telling us about positive events happening in our community.  If we can learn to pass on positive news rather than complain about all that is wrong, we might actually be able to make a positive difference in this world.  You think the media would have figured this out by now and do something about it! 

I wish this brave community success in their continued vigilance and work. They have done a great and noble act in building this Centre.  Those that care know. 

As Caritas, we support and embrace you.  If we can be of assistance, we will be there for you.

A mother sheds a tear for a lost son.

A father feels emptiness in his heart wondering what he could have or should have done differently in life to have made his son stronger.  He is too proud to shed a tear but he is suffocating from the tears he is holding back unable to talk about it. Am I a failure?

A brother and sister cry. They have lost their  innocence knowing that life will never be the same for them.

A family not knowing how to react to the news of what has happened, drifts further apart and cries without being seen. Why are they ashamed?

Doctors, priests, lawyers, the” system” seek to medicate,  console, help or punish,  none really understanding the pain and helplessness everyone is feeling. Their tears (or lack thereof), are simply acknowledging a statistic. One more has succumb to the temptation of a substance.  Another weak link.

Is there hope for that tear?

At this time of the year, our faith, regardless of which one, teaches us that there is hope.  Nature in its own way tries to show us its renewed faith that there is life ahead in the coming seasons.  The harmony around us is seen in nature.  Nature seeks to rebuild after the death inflicted by winter.  The bonds of nature, its burst of vigour despite winter hardship are the lesson we need to learn.

The resurrection of Christ, the tradition of Passover all speak of hope and life.

There is hope and there are signs all around us of this if we choose to see them.  

The knowledge we seek is in our community. It is  the strength we gain from bonding together and helping each other. It is in extending a hand and not turning away.

The tear can spring life back into all of us if we remember the reason for why a tear was shed in the first place.

Life will always have challenges but we must have faith in each other and bond with each other to help each other in difficult times.

Life is beautiful and regardless of the difficulties we each face, we must remember that the answer is not in running or using substances to forget. It is in acknowledging the tear and seeing it as a cleanse, a breathe of renewed life.

One tear is too many  when it doesn’t bring growth to the spirit.

At this time of renewal, I wish our residents, their families and our friends a Happy Easter.

Michael A. Tibollo

Our Fifth Annual gala came to an end and became part of our history on March 27, 2010. It will be remembered for many firsts:

1. The first Latin extravaganza ever hosted by Caritas. Thank you to Myrna Kahan, Toni Reyes and the incredible entertainers that brought culture, and outstanding performances of dance to the event.

2. The first sell out Gala in our history. We sold out and added 17 extra seats to accomodate some of the additional requests we had for seats.

3. The first Gala to have a Title sponsor of $25,000.00. Thank you, Emery Village BIA and Giorgio Mammoliti.

4. The first Gala to feature Miss World International as a spoksperson for Caritas and the work we do.

5. The inspired singing of Grace by our friend, Robert Pilon.

6. Most importantanly, thanks to the generosity of our sponsors and guests, the first Gala in our history to raise $100,000.00 to fund the Caritas Project!!!!!!

On behalf of the Boards of Caritas, I want to express our sincere gratitude in showing your support for the work we do and most importantly for helping us help the residents that need us. Your generosity helps make this world a better place for them, their families and our community.

Reflecting on the success of the Gala, I would be remiss not to mention the hard work and dedication of our Gala Committee, Silvana Tibollo, Paula DiBattista, Maria Chiodo, Lina Variano, Erma Varrano, Lucia Sturino, Teresa Tiano, Franca Linardi and Myrna Kahan. I hope they find the time to repeat what they did next year and perhaps even build on it to make it bigger and better!

I was at a lunch a few months ago and a priest was asked to say Grace. He stood up and said, the shortest and best prayer I ever heard. It was one simple word that if truly appreciated and said with sincerity is all that one needs to say. I want to pray for all of you that have through generosity of time and money made this the most successful event of our history. As I said, the prayer is one simple word and I ask that you accept it from the hearts of our Boards, volunteers, staff and residents, “Thank you” .

We are coming to the most important time of the year for Caritas. By this time next week, our Gala will be part of our history and we will be embarking on our month long telethon. These two events account for the bulking of funds we need to operate our programs.

I would like to express my sincere gratitude to all those that have worked so diligently over the last year to ensure the success of our events.  It is at a time like this that one must reflect back and say that if it wasn’t for the hard work of the volunteers, we would have no events and if we had no events, we would have no funds to operate the community program and bring to light the problems associated with substance abuse.

Our Gala will be the biggest we have ever had and we owe a debt of gratitude to the organizing committee for their relentless efforts to make this a success.  Our staff, this year, despite adversity has demonstrated that their jobs are more than just work but in fact a vocation to help those less fortunate. Their dedication has been inspirational to the community we serve.

The Boards have also rallied behind the organization through dedication and perseverance, believing as I do that our reward is in knowing that we have helped an individual….a family….a friend….the community.
It is important that over this next month, we tell everyone who we are and what we do.  Through our “amore”, “love” and “passion”,” passion” in what we believe, we will bring success to Caritas and save lives.

Some 2009 Volunteers - Thanks for the Help!

The 2010 Telethon is just around the corner and once again we are asking for your help.  We need volunteers to help us man the phones during the televised specials and receive calls from those who want to donate.  Whether you can join us for just one session or want to be here for every one of them, we need your help!

Don’t worry if you’ve never participated before.  We will be providing training before each session. 

For more information, download our Volunteer Registration Form and please don’t hesitate to contact us if you have any questions. 

If you’ve volunteered with us before, head down to the comments and let everyone know how easy it is.

Good Morning.  Here is the latest blog post from Michael Tibollo:

On March 4, 1933, at the height of the Great Depression, in his First Inaugural Address, Franklin D. Roosevelt said,

          “The only thing we have to fear is fear it’self-namless, unreasoning, unjustified, terror which paralyzes needed efforts to convert retreat into advance.”

Have you ever looked into the face of fear?  Have you ever seen fear in someone’s eyes?  How does it feel to be so helpless that you are paralyzed from taking any action to change?

I read an article some time ago about a man that had been swept by the current of the Niagara River to the edge of the waterfall.  He was desperately holding onto a branch which was the only element securing his life from a plunge to certain death.  A fireman, tethered to several fellow firemen jumped into the river and saved the man’s life, risking his own.  When the fireman was pulled out of the river, one reporter asked him why he risked his own life to save the life of a stranger.  The answer was, “I looked into his eyes and I could see that he wanted to live.”

In this case, when the two men were pushed to an extreme, each had to turn fear into action.  Both fearing death, they found the inner strength to get out of harm’s way.

Courageous actions are born to people that turn fear into action. In other words, every individual fears something.  Do nothing and the fear persists, often becoming a haunting demon, bigger than life.  By challenging a fear one can overcome it and turn retreat into advance.

The words of the fireman ring true to me when I look into the eyes of the residents at Caritas.   

A recovering addict in the proper environment learns to overcome his fears.  The fears of recovering addicts are no different than the fears we all face each day in our lives.  Unfortunately, with an addict, a substance becomes a way to cope with the fears.  The fears we all face are often born from deeper mental or emotional problems.  In a therapeutic community, the problems are identified and the residents learn to face those fears and develop skills so that they can cope with them without drugs.

The parents of the residents share a similar fear.  They have the same look in their eyes as do their son’s.  They want their children to overcome the addiction and live a normal life.  Their love often paralyses them to inaction. To change this, they must first recognize that there is a problem and then, they must learn to face it.  The paralysis comes from a lack of understanding, the hope that something will improve.  Unfortunately, without intervention, nothing will change.  Through family groups, parents learn to face their fears and turn them into actions which save lives.  Like the fireman, we must learn to recognize this desire to live in the eyes of our neighbour and find ways to turn it into action.

This lesson can be best summed up by Lt. John B. Putnam Jr. when he wrote,

          “Courage is not the lack of fear but the ability to face it.”   

 Michael Tibollo

March 14, 2010

Thursday night was the launch party of the Caritas Telethon. Through the generous sponsorship of our friends at Vinnie Zucchini’s and the participation of many volunteers, families, businesses, and supporters, we set out a fundraising target of $250,000 to be reached by the end of April. We thank all who attended. We share a few more pictures from this even.

Giorgio Mammoliti (Emery Village BIA Board member) and Sandra Farina (Emery Village BIA Executive Director) pledge $25,000 in support of Caritas (centre of photo)

We spent the day at the beautiful Caritas therapeutic farm at King City. Our friends at TLN continued shooting the stories and messages recounted by our residents in their natural daily routines and therapeutic environments such as the barn, the fields, the spiritual monuments, gazebo, the kitchen, etc.
 

The Caritas Therapeutic Farm

People have often wondered why Caritas places a major phase of its program at a 90 acre farm. It may seem strange at first to suggest that animals and nature itself could play a significant part in a therapeutic treatment program. Phase 2 of the Caritas Residential and Day Program is often a “farm phase” where residents live and learn in a therapeutic farm environment. Part of Caritas’ success in utilizing a farm in the recovery process  is the vision that human restoration is largely facilitated through ecological restoration and animal husbandry. The reason can be very simple. Restoring and taking care of the living environment provides opportunities for healthy outdoor involvement leading to enhanced mental, emotional, and spiritual health. Environmental degradation often leads to emotional stress, loss of self respect with surroundings and with life itself. Healthy lifestyles are more likely with increased physical activity such as herding, transplanting and restoring, and simple acts of selflessness such as caring for animals. These social acts of interaction with other people, with nature, and with animals have proven to be very therapeutic and healing
 
Over the years, through the process of Therapeutic Community, Caritas has developed what has now come to be known as the nurturing environment for thousands. Many have started their journeys from Caritas, leaving behind a powerful legacy of recovery from dependencies. Watch our stories on TLN Telelatino through the month of April and help us in our journey.